Cliches

March 20, 2008

I stared at my grandma who had kicked the bucket. Her mouth wide open, her eyes shut, she looked gentle as a lamb. But the funeral was outside and it was starting to rain buckets, so I hightailed it out of there. I got home but suddenly I had a hole in the roof so rain kept falling through so I had to put a bucket under and then dump it out around the clock. I thought to myself, “wow, I’m gonna be doing this til hell freezes over” so I moved out. Then I had to get a nine to five job to pay for my new, expensive house. The bottom line was that everything but the kitchen sink was brand new. My life was turning into a federal case for being fabulous, and everything was easy as pie. I had a son who turned out sharp as a tack and I was proud as a peacock. Until I died a slow death and was dead as a door nail and then the same happened to him. THE END!

OH NO MAN OH NO

March 13, 2008

You may feel a pain in your knees. Your back will probably hurt. In the morning, you may experience heart attack or stroke. Don’t be surprised if your ears begin to bleed.

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Prescriptions ooooh

March 13, 2008

The medication for my depressive state ended up givin me nothing but hate
So they placed a chip in my brain to make me love
but it cause so much pain that I couldn’t hug anyone
So I got my sweet little rips replaced
but that cause blood to streamed down my face
and out my eyes
So they sewed on a nice disguise
so no one could see
but then something else started hurting me
My arm fell right out the socket,
so I wore a cast,
which caused a pain right near my pocket
It was a tumor in my leg
I started to scream but my mom said “behave!”
Just when I thought it couldn’t get worse,
somebody placed a bomb in my purse
It blew off my arm and caused me such harm
I cried and I cried,
until later my eyes finally dried
…..but then I died

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